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Sunday, April 5, 2009

Ladies and Distress

On the Twitter front, it sounds like the reality show (For the Love of Ray J?) that includes a woman named Cocktail is down to three contestants.  Thank God!  I hope they don’t rerun it.  I hate having all those tweets clogging up my cocktail feed.  The bad news is that Cocktail appears to be one of the lead contenders and may not get kicked off soon.  (This even though I discovered how to block "cocktail" tweets containing “shrimp” or “ray”.) 

My list of saved tweets keeps growing, so I thought I would harvest a bunch to share with you.  I have enough in the queue that I was able to go through and try to find a common theme.  I found a group of tweets that all seem to be from young women under different degrees of cocktail distress.

“Tonight at dinner my mom ordered a giblet as her cocktail. Then a gimlet. She meant a gibson. I drank her gimlet. Mmm, turkey guts.” @beautifulkind 4/3/9 (Well, they all have gin in them (except the giblet). – UM)

“I need a stiff one. Cock or cocktail. I'll take either. I'm not so picky.” @DPH_13 3/26/9 (As for me, I’ll have the cocktail. – UM)

“I like my men like I like my tequila... Able to knock me out with little effort.” @monicawesome 3/24/9 (I like a woman who knows what she likes. – UM)

“for tonight's cocktail party should i look "for real" nice or "hooker that took a shower" nice?” @itsakawskything 4/3/9 (Depends on who you want to hook up with… – UM)

“made the mistake of saying 'cocktail' (dress) in an update & is now being followed by what seems to be a group of alcoholics” @staceeeeee 3/29/9 (No, the UM is not following her. – UM)

 “Almost just puked up the mexican lunch and cocktail I had before working out. Perhaps not a great idea.” @MissBritannyD 4/3/9 (Thanks for sharing that with us – UM)

“I'm working on a new cocktail called The Sheep F*cker” @gloomy_tuesday 4/3/9 (WTF!! This is an original.  (I try to avoid encouraging stereotyping, but I must inform you that she is from Australia.) – UM)


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